fat talk

so like most women I grew up with the women around me saying things like.

" I look/feel so fat today"

"I need to go on a diet"

"she's gotten so fat since I seen her last"

and worst of all

"why is he with her, she's so fat"

I have heard these things enough in my life that when I hear them now I want to punch whoever says them in the mouth.

yesterday a women who I know photographs weddings said as her face book status "my fat butt needs a diet bad!"  and that anger mixed with pity began to rise in me all over again! not only because this women is out of her damn mind if she thinks she fat, but because there are women who she will photograph that are much bigger than her who may read that and then feel instantly bad about themselves.  

and this is the cycle that we women perpetuate. we learn our body image growing up from other people, and then we repeat it all the time.

one of my favorite moments in the last year with my mom was a few months ago. My mom like all of us struggles with her body image but she stood in the mirror this day and exclaimed "I am one sexy bitch!" and my heart burst with happiness and pride.

because the more my mom downs on her body the more I will worry about mine.  and the more she is proud of her body the more comfortable I am with mine. partly because we look so much alike.

Especially young girls. I write this all the time, but:

       80% of 13-year-olds have attempted to lose weight

young girls learn what it means to be a woman by the women around them, and growing up around body negativity breeds body negativity. It's really easy to blame the media, and Photoshop and beauty standards but what sort of damage are we doing when we learn from our moms, sisters and older women in our lives  that we are fat or need to diet, or that being fat makes us worthy of gossip or sideways glances.

I say we love our bodies right where they are even if we aren't happy with them and lets never put ourselves down because when we do we bring others down with us. and you will find its truly revolutionary to encourage other women as well as yourself, because our worth isn't measured in our weight.